Music and I

It has been a common knowledge among the people who know me that I am an expressionless human being. I seldom express my feelings out loud to anybody and it got people assuming that there is nothing wrong with me, that everything is always fine. Admittedly, there are only quite a few people who know me significantly and to whom I always open up. Some good friend can even read my gesture and know my thought immediately. This, I suppose, is an exclusivity to them.

However, being expressionless doesn't mean that I don't have feelings whatsoever. 

As a matter of fact, I'm quite an emotional and sentimental person. It's just that I express my feelings differently. Writing has been the most useful way for me to express my feelings to other people, albeit the fact that sometimes I'm being self-conscious and write as less explicitly as I intend to. Another way is through music. Although I can't play any instrument due to the imbalance of my right and left brain (it seems that I use my left brain a lot more than the right one) - this, however, is not scientifically proven, I appreciate music as much as if I can play an instrument. (Those who dated me knew very well that I expressed my 'love' through music as I don't say "I love you" so often.)

I must always have my earplugs on when commuting and enjoying the music and my thoughts as if I'm in different world as with the other passengers. Or sometimes I would have my Kindle with me, too. I always have the music on when I'm studying or simply when am waiting for the class to begin. Suffice to say that music plays an important part in my day-to-day life. 

You see, I enjoy several different type of music. In general, I listen to electro music. It varies from Electro Dance Music (EDM) to electro/tropical house and trance music, and lately I've been listening to chillstep/chill house. It depends on my mood sometimes, too. 

I usually listen to EDM when commuting or when I'm angry at something or someone and there is nothing I can do about it. I'll have Spotify shuffling Hardwell, Martin Garrix, Steve Angelo, Knife Party and even Skrillex (though not so often I listen to his music). The angrier I feel, the more hardcore the music I play because it'll tire my soul out and therefore I will have no energy left to be angry. But ever so often I listen to their music to lift up my mood in the morning. Conversely, when I feel calm and in a good mood, I'll listen to more chilled or trance EDM such as Kygo, Odesza, Axero, Steve Cadey, Tep No, Broken Back, Thoomas Jack, Robin Schulz, Oliver Nelson (the DJ), Zedd and so on. While my favourite trance DJ's are Above & Beyond, Armin van Buuren, ATB and Tiesto.

Some other time, I would play soft/indie pop, too. It's my thinking music. I have my preference ranged between The Passenger,The Lumineers, Birdy, Regina Spektor, Ben Howard, Vance Joy, Andras & Oscar, to Florence and the Machine. I'd also play instrumental jazz at midnight before bed to help me winding down after a long and rough day. And when I need to focus when studying, I'd play classical instrument.

But most of the time, my Spotify plays EDM. 

By now I'm sure you get the idea of how music impacts me and maybe you get a slight hint of my personality. Do you?

Well, some people assumed that I'm such a clubber or party goer by knowing the truth about what kind of music I listen to. That is such a shallow thought. You know, EDM is the kind of music played in clubs. It's the kind of music played in musical events such as Stereosonic, Future, EDC, etc. Sure, it is. But it doesn't mean I'm a regular clubber, though I do go clubbing every once in a very long time (and by it I mean once or twice in a year). Some even thought I smoked weeds and get high while listening to chillstep. Boy, do they know me not so very well. Of course, I didn't bother to explain this long to them. They are not worth my time explaining, anyway. Other people were simply surprised by the kind of music I listen to. Well, I'm full of surprise, baby!

In the end, it's just me and the music I enjoy listening. What I like about music is that I always find the words I'm looking for in the lyrics, or feeling what I feel in the melody and therefore I will listen to whatever music that fits me well and not worry about what people think of me by it.

Until next post.