It happened to me the other day. My boss, Mr. J, said, "You have a nice and perky ass, Rae." Well, I thanked him for saying that because I took it as a compliment. Also because I know him well enough and I'm sure that he didn't mean any harm by his comment on my ass. It was a genuine gesture of compliment.
In the old days, it would probably upset me. My twisted brain would quickly turn the compliment into an insult. Here is maybe the reason why: I don't like being the center of attention and therefore I don't like people noticing me. Unfortunately, I have curvy hips and perky ass. It's just exactly what it needs to make me noticeable.
During primary school until high school, I took so much effort to hide my assets. I dared not to wear fitted clothes. I hunched my back so my boobs wouldn't stand out, calling for attention. Although I knew my boobs weren't that big. I was 12, for god's sake. (Although, I notice that it gets bigger now after being sexually active. That is not scientifically proven, of course. But whatever. B cup will do me just fine.) As a result, I have a pretty bad posture now. I really need to go see a chiropractor regarding my posture.
Getting all the compliments about parts of my body now feels somewhat like an eye-opener. I don't have to feel ashamed of it. I've seen some people work harder to get what I have. They have to do squat twice as much as I do, while I was born with it. My coworkers acknowledged it verbally, admitting they checked out my ass and agreed I have the best ass at work. (And no. It wasn't in a way of checking me out the way you're thinking. Whatever it is you're thinking.) Thanks to my dad. It's his feature I inherited, while my brothers got Mum's feature; no hips, flat bum. (Sorry, Mum. But you know I love you still!)
Knowing this changes many things about me. One, I accept that I'm curvy in some parts of my body, it being my hips and ass. Two, I shouldn't be ashamed of it. Now I can call back to those who ever teased me and called me names back in school and say, "Hey look, I got a nice and perky ass and nice boobs! And you know what? I don't have to spend so much money in gym because I was born with it. Ha! (I still need to excercise, though.) And lastly, I learn to appreciate myself and be more comfortable and confident. By appreciate meaning I should invest more on yoga pants, fitted jeans and low-cut t-shirts (Mum knows I have dozens of V-neck tees.) That's my goal for Boxing Day this year.
Until next post.
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